Based in New York City, Brittany Allyn explores modern love, self exploration, and what it feels like to be single at 30.
What's Thirty Waves?
If you want to hear someone else’s story to give you reassurance that timelines in life don’t always work out the way we’ve planned, and that’s okay, you're in the right spot.
I love to write about funny dating stories and everyday anxieties you also have but don’t always get to talk about.
I'm not an expert, and sometimes I joke that you should listen to my stories and do the opposite of whatever I did that left me writing in my bed blogging about it. I won't always be innovative with life or relationship concepts, but I'm aiming to rephrase them so they make more sense to me, and hopefully, more sense to you.
who am i?
I’m inspired by good conversationalists, people who are young-at-heart and never want to "grow up", beautiful writing, fashion, wine, visiting museums, mouth-watering food, all things beauty (freezing my skin in time), and exploring the world.
I joke around that I'm an A/B personality. I'm an Aquarius and free-spirit but like making plans and can be head strong. I like the fancy hot-spots...but consider myself a homebody. I'm spiritual and love mediation and yoga, but cannot wait to get dressed up on a Friday night to stay out past 2am with tequila sodas.
I've also ran marketing for a dating app and know first hand what it's like to date in the modern-app world and all the complications that come with finding love in complicated cities like New York.
my love life (On the outside)
From afar, my life can sometimes looks insta-perfect. I've been on 100+ dates. Wined and dined. Flown to exotic places. Traveled around the world. Had one night stands, mini romances (many of them), and a few true loves. I've moved to Europe when everyone told me it was impossible and created strong networks and life-long friends in Seattle, San Francisco, London and New York. I've worked for exciting startups...even a dating app! But still, haven't been able to find "the one". I get asked on a weekly basis...why?
To be honest, I just can't find myself to settle. Unless I feel that magic or that the "lightening has struck", I'm going to keep moving forward.
None of my successes have happened because they're easy. Sometimes I joke I'm a wounded zebra, a naturally socially anxious creature falling around its own feet figuring out how to walk. So much of what I've done was hard at first, but I pushed myself to move forward. My goal in life is to never wonder "what-if" because I've tried almost everything.
In reality, I've experienced very real emotions that almost all 30-somethings have; regardless of where you live or what your lifestyle is. Human emotions are universal. I've been utterly heartbroken...a dozen times. I'm talking, listening to Florence and the Machine crying in my bed with the blinds down sad. Know what it's like to fall out of touch with best friends, and unable to get them back on track. To not have a bunch of savings because I’ve bought way too many clothes and plane tickets. Or lastly, to stay in an unhealthy relationship for way too long. And keep going back.
Our new era
A 31-year-old single woman in 2018 doesn’t have a mold she’s supposed to fit into. No one has the answers or prescription to tell her how to be happy. There isn't a role-model or character that's chosen this new path, except for the fictional Carrie Bradshaw. While I have her beachy hair, curious personality, and ironically have loved a man named Aidan who was really my BIG, I promise to not throw in too many SATC references.
This blog is about being a woman in her 30’s that’s just extended this amount of time. Imagine, for the first time in history, women have an extra 10 years to entirely live for themselves, and instead of 25, you get married at 35 without regrets.
What's my goal?
Maybe you're a "what-if" girl (or guy) yourself. You’re also trying to figure out why your life isn’t so settled. Maybe you’re even looking for some courage not to settle. To break up with that guy you love, but are not in love with anymore... and you worry it's too late to start all over.
I've always been a pretty epic storyteller and gathered epic stories, and Thirty Waves results from that. It's a blog about navigating your thirties and reading too good to not share stories and musings that go with them.
Life experiences, love, thoughts, and emotions all come in waves. It’s our choice to ride them or fight them, or float along them. Hopefully Thirty Waves helps you do just that.
p.s. how i fell in love… with love.
Love has always been the number one topic I never tire of talking about. After grad school I got a job as an Executive Assistant at a Tech company in San Francisco and they had me sit at the front desk. Every day, every employee would stop by and take a break to talk. From VP's, to Sales Bros, to the quiet Engineer cared about one thing above the rest:
Every single person, man or woman, regardless of age or title cared about love more than anything. It was then that I realized how powerful it was to be able to have empathy and talk about it with others. AND I knew I had to start writing about it.